Thursday, January 1, 2015

Shattered Time- 2014


Well, 2014 has been quite the journey for me. I took a break from blogging to focus on what all the Lord was teaching me, but now I am ready to share that with whoever wishes to read.

First and foremost, Abba wanted me to learn to love His heart. This is not something that He showed me how to do all at one time, nor is it something that I have "mastered." But over this past year, I believe that I have seen more of Jesus' heart than I have ever seen before, which was crucial for Him to teach me anything else this year because I needed to let go of the desire to be able to explain everything logically and grab hold of the comfort that I can't, nor should I desire to, lest I think myself like Eve with the desire to know all as God does.

I learned to ask Him the simplest of questions instead of reading a theological book to answer them for me. One way that the Lord taught me to do this was when I began nannying the most precious 1 year old little girl and 3 year old little boy. At the adventurous age of 3, you can imagine that this little boy has had LOTS of questions for me about all kinds of things, ranging from "why do I have to brush my teeth?" to "what happens when people die?" When he started asking me questions about Jesus, life, and heaven that I did not know how to answer without using big theological terminology, my heart was broken. I thought, "If I can't explain the Gospel to a 3 year old, then what good am I?!" I was forced back onto the lap of my Abba, asking Him the same questions that this little boy was asking me, to hear what HE had to say about them. Sitting in the arms of my Daddy, hearing Him declare over me the simplest yet most profound Truth that He loves me and truly wants what is best for me, so much so that He sent Jesus to die in my place so that He could have a relationship with me, humbled me in such a way that I have never experienced before.

The stained glass of proper doctrine was shattered as Jesus crashed through it with open arms... for ME! Me. How can that be true? How can it be that the perfect God-Man could even stand to be around me with all of my sin, because clearly I am not perfect! This concept was, and still is to some extent, so puzzling for me. It's actually quite funny how the Father used the movie Interstellar to make this Truth come alive in my heart (side note, if you haven't seen it, go see it right now! I promise I won't spoil it for you in what I am about to say). Time is a big theme in Interstellar, and after watching it I was so curious about the concept of time. We measure everything in some form of time, whether it is actual minutes, hours, and days, or how many times you have to fail at something before you succeed. Either way, the basic principle of measuring in time is that it is always moving forward; we can never go backward, never stand still, and never jump ahead.

So how did time start? Going back to the beginning, where Scripture tells us that I AM was before time even began (Ps. 90:2), God created the heavens and the earth and established time for us humans. He created the sun, moon, and stars, by which we measure our days. He created a space-time continuum that we can barely understand, which makes it an even greater mystery how God transcends that continuum (Ps. 90:4; 2 Peter 3:8)! But oh, am I glad that He does transcend time, for that very fact is what allows His patience with my sinful heart. Because Jesus is God, He is eternal. This eternal aspect of Christ is what made His sacrifice on the cross efficient for the atonement for the sins of His people, because His blood covered the past, present, and future sins! But not just that, when He rose from the dead and defeated darkness, reigning in righteousness, that same righteousness that has now been given to me also transcends time! So, outside of this world, where I measure everything in time, I am also eternally positionally righteous before the Father. WHAT in the world?! Even though now during my "time" I am sinning, outside of time that sin does not exist anymore because it's been paid for, so the God of all the universe who cannot be in the presence of sin and who transcends time, ENTERS IN to my time in life and is still walking with me, has still given me the Helper, that is His Spirit, who stays with me at all times. Why? Because He cares. It is as simple as that. 

The concept of time had to exist here on earth in order for God to transcend it so that He could still be present with us in our sin. 
If that doesn't blow your mind, then I don't know what will!

This very real Truth is not meant to be interpreted as an excuse for abusing grace. Jesus still calls us to strive for holiness and has even given us the Spirit so that we can do that, as He is transforming us to be more like Christ. Although time does not affect God, He has designed it to where time does affect us... that is why over time, wounds are healed; over time, we change; over time, we become more like Jesus. So with my time, I want to do more than just the normal day-to-day. The child inside of me has been awakened, and she wants to GO! Where? I have no idea. But I know that with the little time God has designed for me to be here on earth, I don't want to waste it, especially when there are people who have never had someone step into their time and love them in the name of Jesus.

"He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, He has put eternity into man's heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end." Ecclesiastes 3:11


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